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Yes, i want him fighting by my side
0% (0 votes)
No, He's another English Watcher Fruit. Who needs him?
0% (0 votes)
There are ideas here, but He needs work
100% (4 votes)
I wanted to play a Simon too!
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 4
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Does Simon makethe cut?
I have to go with a tentative maybe here as well. My main concerns are the same as Heather's, but they may go a bit deeper. I've personally established a certain hierarchy in the Watcher's Council in this game and I feel that this submission ignores most of what we've done regarding that organization...the fact that the current troubles aren't even mentioned doesn't bode well at all. I think it would be better if the potential player got a better feel for what the Council is about at this stage in our mythos.
Maybe I'm being unfair, but at this stage in the game, I really feel like a person who is serious about wanting to get involved should actually do some reading and get a feel for where we all stand. At this point, the Watcher's Council is playing a very major role in our stories and that can't be ignored.
I really don't have as many qualms about grammar, sentence structure, and paragraphing as the other English majors on this board. But, I can appreciate how hard it can be sometimes to make sense of what is being written. I probably give a lot more leeway to someone who is not actually posting on the board. I know I don't always use capitalization or punctuation elsewhere in the forums.
I do, however, have a major need to see a lot of detail in a character submission. I am one of those that wants to know a lot about who your character is and what motivates them, so that I can see how much thought you've put into this game. I especially lean towards those that actually give us a sort of "mini post" in their submissions. You know the ones I'm talking about. The one's who are actually telling us a story when they submit a character. That level of detail indicates a willingness to commit (although not all of them follow through) and makes me more inclined to vote yes.
Ok, I guess I've rambled on enough about character submissions in general. Sorry, guys.
Does Simon makethe cut?
Perhabs.....
After Delancre´s been dealt with of course.
Does Simon makethe cut?
Heh, you're not alone Niko, I can't stand bad spelling and grammar in posts. I mean I'm not pedantic about it, the odd spelling mistake I can cope with, but when people don't paragraph or put things into readable sentences it irks me no end. But then I'm an English graduate too. :D
Does Simon makethe cut?
You definately don't belong to the Christopher Cherniak school of paper writing. He always told us that as far as he was concerned, we could write an entire paper in broken, pidgeon english and still get an A, so long as we had a good argument.
Does Simon makethe cut?
That's the thing, they don't seem like the simple little mistakes we make when writing posts. It looks to me like he honestly doesn't know any better. For me, that's a problem. But that's just the "writes ten essays a week and is working on a publishable paper english & philosophy major" in me talking.
Does Simon makethe cut?
hehe You've obviously not seen some of our writers' posts "in the raw" yet, then. :) Most of us do use Word (or an equivalent) for doing posts, to eliminate the worst spelling, etc, errors. Then your friendly neighbourhood Grammar Nazi (me) comes along and fixes up the posts as she timelines them. Currently I'm running about a page behind, but that's only because I've been collabing like a fiend these past several days.
And trust me, speaking as the Grammar Nazi, I've seen far worse than this guy when it comes to writing style. :) Though on the same note, it does make it a lot easier if we get people who can actually construct a sentence.
Does Simon makethe cut?
Well, I think its pretty good, but it didnt rock my world, so I leave it up to you to decide.
PS: Potential, I mean I think the person could be just fine if they elaborated alittle....im ranting. enough now.
Does Simon makethe cut?
I promise that this is not grudge criticing because of the name thing. I did the same then, neh? My main complaint is the boy's grammar and structure. Granted, I make some mistakes here and there, but the incomplete sentences, lack of spacing, et al makes my eyes twitch when reading this piece. I'd suggest he write out his posts in Word (or his prefered open-source word processing program) before posting. This little effort would make his posts far less painful to this english major.
Does Simon makethe cut?
Besides what Heather has said my only real issue is that his parents were killed...although brownie points for it not being vampires sending him on a revenge quest..thing...
Other than that I like it.
Does Simon makethe cut?
My only real issue with this character is his reason for coming to LA at this time.
Maybe, once Season 4 is over and Delancre has been dealt with, the remnants of the Watchers' Council would send someone (or possibly a team) to assess the damage that Ambrose had caused. But DURING Delancre's stay in LA, given that he's the head of the Watchers' Council, there's already a strong Watcher presence in LA and I doubt Delancre would authorise such a mission for a relatively new Watcher unless he intended to draft Archer into his little cadre.
Such missions don't come from individual Watchers to other Watchers - the WC is an organised structure and such missions would have to be issued by the Council as a whole. If this new character is intended to be introduced after Season 4 is finished, then I can see the "inventory LA" mission as being acceptable - but it still wouldn't be just from the grandfather, but from the Council that replaces Delancre's structure.
Aside from the issues with the mission, however, he does seem like a good, solid character. The name Simon, of course, will have to go - mind if we call you Bruce?
Does Simon makethe cut?
His name will have to change, so don't vote for revision based on that.
Other than that it seems a solid character. He's got a background, deep ties to the traditional Watchers' Council and he;s 100% human. No additives or alterations.
I say consider him, and hopefully some of the membership will find him and talk to him via email or MSN to get a feeling for what kind of person his is.
Character Proposal: Simon Archen
Below is the result of your feedback form. It was submitted by
(Malone528@aol.com) on Wednesday, June 9, 2004 at 17:36:42
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charname: Simon Archen
race: Human
gender: Male
bdate: 10/11/78 New York
group: The Watchers' Council
position: Watcher
descript: Has a short blonde hair. Usually does not smile(force of habit). Where dark cloth jackets with jeans. Dark leather gloves and combat boots.
history: Simon was born in England. Then when he was five he and his family moved to New York.He liked it there. Kept his nose clean. When he was nine Simon did not belive his parents when they said there was nothing hiding in his closet. One night he waited with a kitchen knife and when it came out killed it in a bloody mess. Parents were woken by shrieking(both Simon and the monster).
His parents grew conserned hoping that family would be able to make Simon forget the unknown pest that he killed and decided to take him back to England. They made arrangements and travel plans and two weeks later were moving to England.
They arrived and were driving to the family home when the car was attacked. Simon's parents were killed but he survived because he had lost consisness in the back seat. He was brought to the police and later put into the custody of his Grandfather Edward Archen. He is a watcher himself and soon began to train Simon how to handle himself. How to shoot rifles, pistols, shotguns, crossbows. He also taught him to see what most other people do not. He also learned much from his Grandfather's occult books but had no luck learning other languges which limited Simon in how much he could expand his knowledge.
But for the most part he is ready. His grandfather cannot teach him anymore and deemed him ready to stand on his own two feet. So he sent him to LA on a small little mission to see how LA is progressing. How many hunters, how many demons and there power in the area.
items: 2 .45s, Long sword, rope, hunting knife, cross( around neck), Book of legends, Book of known demons(record of powerful demons)
powers: He has knows how to fight a bit. He can shoot well. But not much field experience in battle. Is willing to use his guns. He can recite lines from his books but is always unconfident in his skills.
played_by: Sean Patrick Flanery
player: I have played a lot of white wolf as well as a little Buffy game. I am 19 and I sell tickets at Brookfield zoo.
age: over13
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